Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Good morning!

Yesterday's water fast was going great until I got home from school at 7 (I'm in Drama Club after school) and stepped on the scale. It read a whopping 180! My jaw dropped. I couldnt believe it, I gained 3 pounds??? I walked around the whole day guzzling on water like I was in a damn desert. I broke the fast and had a Caesar salad and two Brownies.
After my shower I stepped on the scale and was amazed once again to see the scale read 177.2 I thought the scale was broken until I realized my dumbass had on a bunch of clothes and my shoes and socks when I first weighed myself, so I basically broke the fast for Nothing -__-
I went to bed around nine, and when I woke up I weighed myself again. So here are the stats:

                     CW: 176.4
               1st GW: 150
              2nd GW: 140
                   UGW: 135

I have a full bottle of water and a 110 calorie bag of corn flakes lol that's like the only healthy snack in my house. Before I end this post, I just wanna share the main reasons Why I want to lose weight.
1. PROM—Who wants to look like a fat cow on one the most important nights of their life??
2. CONFIDENCE—I want to turn heads, I want to wake up in the morning and know that I'm gorgeous and that No matter what I'll never forget it!
3. MY EX—When we broke up he called me a fat bitch over and over again. I can't wait to lose weight and Watch him eat his decrepit heart out..hehe
3. CLOTHES—You notice how all the cute shit is for the skinny girls?? Yeah. I want to wear skin tight dresses and short shorts and most of all, CROP TOPS!
4. NAKED—I'm not a promiscuous girl, but I'm No virgin either. I want to be able to bear all and not be shy about it. Worrying about a fat roll really takes the fun out of sex!
5. HEALTH—When you get a chance find out what the healthy weight is for someone your height. I find out I should be at the Max 150 pounds. I'm 5'4. I don't want to be the maximum, I'm striving for less.

There are more reasons but those are the top 5.
Stay beautiful <3

Monday, November 26, 2012

Off to a rough start cont.

I thought I could handle the pressure, but I cracked. I walked into the kitchen and ran smack dab into a plate of Brownies. I had one, and a gummy, one starburst, and a fun size pack of skittles.
Oh but that's not the worst part.
At the doctors office my baby sisters were complaining that they were hungry, so my mom left and brought back CHECKERS! Ugh! She got me my favorite—the chicken bites box!

I only ate half of it, feeling like a slob. And she offered a bite of her Bacon Burger. I took like..four.
When I got home, the Brownies assaulted me again. I'm so ashamed. I ate like a total fatass Today. If I step on the scale and find myself anywhere in the 180's I'll cry.

I decided to keep my water bottle full at all times, so I can do my first water fast tomorrow. I pray it wont be too hard, I'll keep telling myself that it's just one day. It's just food for pickles sake! Not air! I hope it goes well!

<3 Goodnight lovez

Off to a rough start

So Sunday I was supposed to only eat 500 calories but that didn't go so well. My mom wanted me to cook this extravagant breakfast with homemade pancakes, Bacon, scrambled eggs, and sausages. Let's just round that off to one or two BAGILLION calories. Yeah.

And THEN I ate leftovers from Thanksgiving. And THEN I made the most delicious moist mouthwatering Brownies. I looooove to bake and cook, but mostly bake lol.

                CW: 179.8

Not as bad as I thought. Right now I'm just relieved that I'm finally in the 70's. Now if we could just zoom to the 60's that would be great!

I woke up this morning with a belly ache (I have chronic digestive issues) and determination to not go over 500. My mom wanted Dunkin' Donuts. Sigh. So here it is:

Small French vanilla coffee w/Milk and sugar: 140
Chocolate glazed donut: 370

I had No idea a donut had so many calories!

My family nickname is Piggy, I've been called that since I was a wee babe, still is till this day. So I call that voice inside my head that makes me wanna eat more Piggy. She's such a bossy bitch.
Anyway, I'm thinking about dancing again, I took a break for medical issues I don't wish to disclose, but it's a good way to burn calories!


I will try my hardest to not eat for the rest of the day. Just water. I hate tea lol I really do, but Maybe I'll choke it down. If it gets too bad, I'll have an orange or some celery.

Let's do this >_<

<3 see ya!

Saturday, November 24, 2012

Starting life anew..

Hola peoples :) I was supposed to start this blog a while ago but alot has been happening, so here it goes!

First things first this blog is to motivate me and Hopefully motivate others. I know I posted that I was 183 but I weighed myself this morning and (finally) I'm 178.7 lbs. Then again it was in the morning...but I haven't seen it in the 70's in a year! I really hate my body :( but I'm going to change it! I'll try every diet to get where I want to be!

                 CW: 179
          1st  GW: 150
          2nd GW: 140
              UGW:  135

On most ProAna /Thinspo blogs the girls are going for 115lbs or less, but I'm 179 and look 150 (I think it's my breasts that hold most of the weight lol—I'm a DD!) So I'm going to see how I look at 135lbs and if it's not good enough I'll just keep going.

Tomorrow I'm gonna start things off nice and easy with 500cals a day for a week, and try some other diets a long the way. We can't afford exercise equipment, my mom thinks gym memberships take your money, and there aren't and free ones around here so all I have is my body and some sneakers :)

I'll post thinspo pics of course but I do not own any of them and if you don't want your picture up kindly tell me and I'll take them down ASAP :)

Enough talk, thinspo time!

I love all types, Celebrity, model, black, white, real girl, emo/scene, and before/afters!